2-20-08: Creepy Senility
I came through the night OK with a few leg cramps. The shower-getting-place was closed so I took another hike but just a short one then I lay around and enjoyed the heat on my sore muscles until noon. I went into town and scouted out a camping place that claims Internet access for Saturday night so I can catch up before a probable period of days when I won’t have access. I then went into town and went into the grocery and found all the stuff I couldn't find yesterday. So much depends on one’s own attitude.
I waited on a bench across the street for the 3PM twelve step meeting to start. By three o’clock I was working on a resentment and finally read the sign in the window which said today’s meeting was where I had waited on Monday and Monday’s meeting had been here. I jumped in the car feeling incompetent again and got to the meeting about 15 minutes late. Very chatty meeting with a lot of gossip but reassuring to know that there is some semblance of a support group in the area.
The topic was honesty so I talked a little about how my creeping senility was distressing me. I had a good memory and to lose it feels like a humiliation. It was a gift on loan and I thought I owned it. Still, I find myself more times per day than ever before saying: “I like this. This feels good”
After the meeting I went back to town to do email and learned from a friend that there was to
be a lunar eclipse tonight. Back at the beach I drove to an area that would have a good view and set up the camera and made dinner. It was gorgeous. No light pollution, the moon on the water, the sound of flying fish and crickets, long lingering sunset, the moon rising over the pink uninhabited desert mountains, good rice and beans, and the moon looking so rosy and spherical. It was also a lesson in how we see so much better than the camera. I could get the camera to record either the bright area or the shaded area with detail but not both. I could see it through the lens but the camera couldn't record it. I expect camera tech will catch up to us in a few years but, for now, photography is still a study in compromise.
I waited on a bench across the street for the 3PM twelve step meeting to start. By three o’clock I was working on a resentment and finally read the sign in the window which said today’s meeting was where I had waited on Monday and Monday’s meeting had been here. I jumped in the car feeling incompetent again and got to the meeting about 15 minutes late. Very chatty meeting with a lot of gossip but reassuring to know that there is some semblance of a support group in the area.
The topic was honesty so I talked a little about how my creeping senility was distressing me. I had a good memory and to lose it feels like a humiliation. It was a gift on loan and I thought I owned it. Still, I find myself more times per day than ever before saying: “I like this. This feels good”
After the meeting I went back to town to do email and learned from a friend that there was to
be a lunar eclipse tonight. Back at the beach I drove to an area that would have a good view and set up the camera and made dinner. It was gorgeous. No light pollution, the moon on the water, the sound of flying fish and crickets, long lingering sunset, the moon rising over the pink uninhabited desert mountains, good rice and beans, and the moon looking so rosy and spherical. It was also a lesson in how we see so much better than the camera. I could get the camera to record either the bright area or the shaded area with detail but not both. I could see it through the lens but the camera couldn't record it. I expect camera tech will catch up to us in a few years but, for now, photography is still a study in compromise.
posted by Pattison at
6:01 PM
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